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Wednesday, 8 May 2013

Hello again strangers!

Wow- what a hiatus that has been!

For starters, an apology for the longest break in the historyy of this blog!
You may be familiar with the fact that whenever usually apologising for an absence from my writing, my posts tend to start in somewhat of a negative vein, whilst I explain the latest illness/complication that has caused my absence; today however, I am pleased to report that it's not all negative- in fact, I am over-the-moon to announce that I am going to be a mummy! The pregnancy thus far has been far from plain sailing, and complications relating to my degenerative condition and subsequent neuro medication and a diagnosis of hypremesis gravidarum, have rendered me so far worse than useless, as I became so weak that I had to be admitted to hospital a number of times.

Thankfully now able to look at a computer screen for longer than 2 seconds, (the 'Royal' condition of hypremesis has made me sick up to fifty times a day 
and prevented me from using a computer or phone for the past few months), I am thrilled to finally be back in the realms of normality again and saying a well overdue 'hi' to you.

My husband and I have wanted to start a family for some time now, yet have been prevented from doing so by the concerns from my drs and consultants over the affects on my spine and neurologcal condition, as well as how the baby and I would cope with pregnancy and my medication.
You may recall from my previous posts on this matter, that there had been some concern in the past that carrying child, or even conceiving a child, may not be possible- so you can imagine my delight and relief to find out that our dreams had indeed come true and we shall be welcoming our new addition in July.

Exploring the world of baby 'gumpf' has been interesting to say the least.
Not only have we learnt that these tiny wee things are ridiculously expensive little consumers, but that the lack of adaptive baby equipment is extraordinary!

With a couple of exceptions for manual wheelchairs, we have found no tailored buggies or prams and no adapted baby furniture either.
I long to be proved wrong, so should you be able to do so, do please drop me a line.

Before I log out for today, I want to thank those of you who have helped so much in terms of practical assistance and support in the establishing of 'Get a Life!' As a charity in law.

I apologise from the bottom of my heart that I regrettably had to cancel 'Get a Life!'s' first fundraiser. Unfortunately I was hospitalised with the hypremesis gravidarum, ( severe sickness, that requires the sufferer to be put on a drip and IV drugs).
I was also unfortunately suffering from a nasty infection on top of the hypremesis at the time of 'Get aLiVE!', as well as having to cope without my neurological drugs.
All in all, this left me unable to perform even the simplest of tasks, so regrettably the event had to be cancelled due to these and other circumstances outside of my control.
This break in progress is by no means any indication that Get a Life! will be slowing down.

If anything, this pregnancy has made me even more determined for this charity to provide support to people and their families affected by a life changing injury or illness.
The lack of equipment available for people such as myself who use sticks or wheelchairs has just astounded me and as I look at how Garry and I are going to muddle through and adapt our buggies, cots and changing units etc. I welcome any of the baby equipment providers to get in touch to work with me to develop products so that others to not have to struggle through.

We are told growing up as inquisative teenagers that pregnancy is indiscriminate and could happen to you your first time.
I disagree- <barring the obvious excetions), sadly pregnancy is a gift that is given only to those lucky people who are fortunate enough to conceive. Disability however is indiscriminate and could happen to you the first time you drive a car, ride a bike, take on a black run or even walk down the street.
For something that could happen to literally anybody no matter of their wealth, success, race, gender, or mental attitude to life- there should be better provisions in place to support people through this adaptation and adjustment.

On a lighter note- another unavoidable factor in life is getting older, which I am sad to to say will be the case for me tomorrow when I wave a fond goodbye to my twenties tomorrow!

It has of course been a pretty eventful decade that saw me find a job I adored teaching and choreographing dance; fly around the world with Virgin Atlantic as an air hostess and then have to say goodbye to both of these loves when an accident on an innocent road trip left me with life changing injuries.

Since then I have rebuilt my life by marrying my rock and best friend Garry, starting this blog and charity and now be only a couple of months away from becoming a Mummy- something that at one stage none of my doctors thought possible!

Life can surely deal us a varied hand, but I truly believe it is how we cope with what is thrown at us that matters- to quote one of my favourites...

"It's not what happens to you, but how you react to it that matters".- Epictetus.

This is not to say that you should feel dreadful and a failure if you feel unable to see the positives in your own life as you read these words. Feeling lost and frightened and even bitter is all part of the grieving process of the loss of the life that you thought you would live- trust me, I've been there!

I have sat in the darkened room, cried all of the tears I felt were in me, snapped at well meaning loved ones and felt envious of those still dancing and flying around the world.
I felt on more than one occasion that I would never be as happy as I once was in my old pre-disabled life, but through using the emotional tools that 'Get a Life!' aim to provide all people with life changing accidents or illnesses with,( along with MUCH support from my amazing family and friends!!!), I can now see that my life is now better for that fateful day back in July 2006 on the A337.

I now appreciate the smaller things in life that I used to zoom past without even noticing.

I truly feel that with only a few short hours left in my twenties, that although tough, painful and at times incredibly dark and depressing- that my twenties have actually been pretty fabulous, even though seven of the ten of the years have been spent in bed and in my wheelchair, as I have seen them through new eyes, with a new frame of mind I wonder if I ever would have reached without my accident.

On that note, it is time to sign off as I am off to celebrate this fact with my loved ones.

I hope that wherever you are and whatever you are dealing with, that you will find something to make you smile today- as trying to find at least one thing to be thankful for, even on my bad days was the start of the shift that changed my life to where it is now- a happy, (still not all that well or healthy), but incredibly blessed twenty-something- (well, for 8 more hours at least!).

I promise to do my best to say hello again as soon as I am able.

Many thanks again for your patience with me.

Best wishes always,